To the Editor:
Uncle Josh and the automobile
Well, sir, I’ve gone and done it. Nancy said, “Joshaway, we should get one of those automobileous wagons everyone is getting.”
Well, sir – when they delivered it to the farm I got out the book of rule and the more I read it the less I knew about the innards of that machine. Then Jim Lawson came over and says “You’re supposed to turn that crank in front to make it go.”
Well, I turned that dern crank until my eyes bugged out and it wouldn’t go.
So then I knelt down in the yard to think it over, and Nancy said the language I was using was just shameful.
Well, then Jim Lawson says – “You have to put this thing in somewhere.”
So we found where it went and I turned the crank and that machine began to roar and snort – it ran over Jim Lawson’s dog – tore a hole in Les Williams picket fence – then it started off down the pasture and killed four sheep and a calf and then ran into a haystack and blew up.
Well, sir – all I got out of that joy ride was a broken leg, some rubber tires, six lawsuits and a mortgage on our farm. Nancy says if we ever own another one we will get a regular chauffeur to run it. I ain’t saying much – but I got lingerin’ suspicions that all my joy riding will be done in an old buckboard wagon.
As ever, Wilf Miller, Keremeos